January 22, 2010
-
Pursuing Dreams
I'm in a funk! I have dreams (wishful goals) that I want to pursue, but I want to keep my dreams pristine... Explanation: my dreams usually end with champagne pouring down from the sky, a vault full of gold coins that I swim in every morning, and adoration from everybody. To have my pristine dreams burst into flames, crumble into ash, and to have the wind carry it away is not acceptable. But I hate being in a funk.
I've been contemplating one goal for over a year now and I still can't push myself to do it; photographer. Professional photographer. My handicap is the positive comments and reviews I receive from uploaded pictures on Facebook, Flickr, and this blog. I'm the type of dude that feeds on public acceptance and awareness (lack of a better word). Even though I know I'm a leader; I'm more of putting your needs before mine. So, the glorious comments I receive only confuse me more because I'm not sure if you're being real, or not. Honestly, I just don't want to end up like the contestants on American Idol who are laughed off the stage because they lacked talent even though they believed in themselves and had supporters who kept feeding their "ego". But they're heroes for stepping forward and I'm still a chicken hiding in the corner. This isn't a plea to stop having my friends leave loving comments, or keep away from encouraging me to pursue my dreams, but... Self-therapy. If I talk (write) about my fears publicly then maybe it'll be easier to overcome them. Who knows?! I just hate being in a funk.
Anyway, I just can't end a blog post without attaching a photo. Please vote for this iPhone picture: www.contest.adorama.com/entries/16792 (Adorama iPhone Photo Contest) Thanks! (Baby K. is dreaming of the grand prize.)
I get a little sad when I look at this picture. I want my baby girl to pursue all of her dreams and to dream big, but I'm contradicting myself because her daddy is still in the minor leagues with his dreams. Sad! Also, she is growing up way too fast! Double sad!!
